Monday, June 8, 2015


The whirling sound of  the ceiling fan is my background noise as my mind tries to conjure up something witty to say.

All is peaceful on the home front as I watch the trees sway slowly from left to right as the wind blows so gently while the clouds glide by blocking out the sun.

I leisurely sit at my desk scrolling through the latest real estate news on my trusty laptop, keeping up to date on the market. All while multitasking and playing catch up reading my Wall Street Journal. Oh how exciting........NOT!!! 

At least I did manage to get my workout done bright and early this morning, which I am proud to say that I've been sticking to my routine, except I still struggle with winging myself off the junk food....bad, bad girl! Well at least I've been cutting down on the sweets!!!

The other day as I tried to meditate in silence, I realized that I needed to figure out what I truly wanted. For years I've tried to be everything to everyone but myself and I ended up losing a part of myself, which I've been struggling to get back.

After thirteen years of being in a marriage that not only had broken my heart but also my spirit, I realized that I had built a wall within myself and I'm finding it difficult to tear it down. So lately I feel as if I'm in a constant battle over this.

There are days where I feel like I'm just existing but I don't feel alive, if that makes any sense. I go through the motions but there's something missing and it's the fire that once burned fiercely within me. So I struggle to get that back but it hasn't been easy and I will not give up until that fire burns brightly once again.. So I will do whatever is necessary to make it so, even if I have to force myself to open up to the possibilities!!!!

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